(no subject)
May. 20th, 2003 12:27 amThrifting today. Got lots of new shirts, including one I'll call the quicksilver shirt. It's pretty. I'm gonna wear it tomorrow.
I've been feeling good lately. I'm not sure why, but I guess I'm past the misery. Now I'm just nostalgic and wistful and reminescent and all that good stuff. And I'm enjoying the minutes, because I can actually count them now, until I'm no longer in high school, until these people are a part of the past (the closest, I hope, to remain part of my present and future).
I'm sorry I'm so focused on it, but it's a big part of my life. As I've gone through high school, relations with other people have become the most vital thing to me. They are mostly all I write about, and... I would not function well completely on my own. I need a lot of quiet, personal, alone time, but without other people, I cannot survive. And I've spent so long on the relationships I do have, and I love these people dearly, and it's... so very odd to think that in three months, I will live somewhere where I don't really know anyone. If you'd asked me two months ago, I would have said there was nothing I'd rather do. I wanted somewhere where people didn't know me, where I didn't feel like I'd fucked everything up beyond repair. But now... now... now.
I am different, again.
And I just want to say to you all, I love you so very much.
I've been feeling good lately. I'm not sure why, but I guess I'm past the misery. Now I'm just nostalgic and wistful and reminescent and all that good stuff. And I'm enjoying the minutes, because I can actually count them now, until I'm no longer in high school, until these people are a part of the past (the closest, I hope, to remain part of my present and future).
I'm sorry I'm so focused on it, but it's a big part of my life. As I've gone through high school, relations with other people have become the most vital thing to me. They are mostly all I write about, and... I would not function well completely on my own. I need a lot of quiet, personal, alone time, but without other people, I cannot survive. And I've spent so long on the relationships I do have, and I love these people dearly, and it's... so very odd to think that in three months, I will live somewhere where I don't really know anyone. If you'd asked me two months ago, I would have said there was nothing I'd rather do. I wanted somewhere where people didn't know me, where I didn't feel like I'd fucked everything up beyond repair. But now... now... now.
I am different, again.
And I just want to say to you all, I love you so very much.